Olga's Poetry & Thoughts

I'm a fish on the concrete A can of pop half-sweet Lollipop in my hair Shadows everywhere Truth is, I'm terrified Of the vultures in my mind Of the ravens in my chest Of the ruptures on my breast Of the large hand on the clock Of the beckoning tick tock Of my desire for a feast Of my lusting for a beast Of the empty castle walls Of the porcelain white dolls Of the risk I never took Of my fancies for a crook Of the choices I have killed Of the gaps I wrongly filled Of the tears upon the floor Of the bodies on the shore Truth is, I'm terrified Of my self.

At U of T we are squished side by side like sardines We feed off of textbooks and concentrated caffeine We each have our ambitions and hunger for success We all panic a lot more than we would like to confess What makes this group special is that we survive U of T And come back during break to help others succeed Sadly, many people these days are stingy and cold But I look around the room and see hearts made of gold Life is a stray beast that is unpredictable and cruel Life can lift you up, life can make you feel like a fool Life can take you up in its jaws and swallow you whole Life can also teach you things because life has a goal The goal is to help others slay the beasts they possess ‘Cause we all have dark monsters that we like to suppress All we need is a person to listen and understand Someone to protect us and lend a warm hand But how will you ever find a savior for your troubles If you’re too afraid to save someone else from the rub...

With a 50% divorce rate in Canada, it is no wonder that the definition of "family" has been meddled with. The stereotypical Berenstain Bear-esque family consisting of two chubby parents in overalls, a protective older brother and a sister in a bow tie has been long diminished. Maybe children's television shows should show some foster families or single parent families instead to appeal to the masses. But then again, a programme like "Franklin & His Single Mother" would not be considered a "mainstream" show. There are many myths surrounding single parent families; it's as if it's taboo to talk about it. But I'm going to go ahead and list some of the assumptions that really bother me- concerning both single parents and children of those single parents. A single parent family is poor. Sure, when a couple splits up, they are usually left with a considerably lower income than before. In addition to salary, the single parent also receiv...

I used to be afraid of many things, Of snakes and spiders and rejection. To me, compliments were like bee stings, I used to be desperate for affection. I used to be afraid of thoughts, Of people talking behind my back. I didn’t realize that they forgot About me, so they cut me some slack. I used to be afraid of rotten words, What a bitch, they all would say. Each sliver of gossip that I overheard, Would haunt me day by day. I used to hate myself for making mistakes, I was angry at the naïve stupid me. I used to bend so far I would break, I wished to be perfect and free. Anxiety wrapped itself around my neck, I would choke on the teasing and hate. I used to think of myself as a wreck, I used to think that it was too late. Humans are faulty, it’s the way we are, We make choices of which we’re ashamed. Without trial and error we wouldn’t go far, ‘Cause it’s our delusions that make us the same. Should’ve said this and ...

I had an interesting dream last night. One that is recurring. I don't really know what it means, but Yahoo answers told me that I'm "shedding a past." To be honest this dream just scares the shit out of me and I wish it would stop. Maybe writing about it will make it go away. Let me remember how it starts... I'm sitting at some sort of diner but not eating anything. There is faint rock and roll music in the background. I have a phone with a cord (this is how I know that I am dreaming). I dial a number and a man's voice answers. "Hello?" "Hi. This is me." "What can I do for you today?" "I would like to book a funeral, please." (The man sighs and shuffles some papers, presumably looking down some sort of list). "How is Monday at two o'clock?" "I have a show to attend that day. Can it be on Tuesday?" "Very well. Who is the funeral for?" "For myself." ...

I've been thinking about my history lecture last Thursday. We were learning about the history of America's encounters with the Natives. The professor put up a slide explaining The Wild West Weekly , a "Cowboys and Indians" magazine with stories and sketches of western life. This weekly subscription from early 20th century America would usually not spark my interest, but what intrigued me were its characters, namely Arietta Murdock. She and Young Wild West (a handsome youth with the body of Apollo, as he is described) go on adventures and kick ass, basically. I'm proud of this Arietta character, who is a golden haired heroine in a time when women weren't even allowed to vote. The reasons why Arietta Murdock is badass: - She is a highly skilled horseback rider and rides vicious broncs - She saves Young Wild West's ass when he's tied up and about to get killed by the Sioux - She is also really good with weaponry - She is considered physically st...

Today is special because it is certain Tomorrow is behind a black curtain Yesterday exists only in my mind, it seems Memories are exclusive to my dreams One day the romance and the lust Will shrink into a speck of dust And all the hatred that I had felt Will hiss and boil over and melt One day the remorse and the pain Will go down the bathroom drain My skin will be moth's food, I'll smile 'Cause I survived on earth this whole while You and I hate each other we do But I have a pulse and so do you One day when we're wrinkled you'll see Just how special you were to me And by you I mean everyone I know I look into heaven and I don't wanna go Can I love everyone at one time? I want to hug you all, is that a crime? One day I'll forgive you and I I'll meet God up there in the sky I'll be a number, anon deceased Remember me, a moth's feast One day my destinations will be done I'd have vis...