Hooray. I graduated from the notoriously soul-sucking, snobbish, yet also beautiful and prestigious establishment that is the University of Toronto. When asked, "what have you learned in your four years?" nothing remotely related to academia comes to mind. I could say that I learned about wacky political philosophers and their undying sexist theories. I could tell you that I acquired "critical thinking skills," improved my writing and grammar, and can now read a Victorian novel in one day without a problem. But the things that I was taught in my classes are not the things that have stuck with me the most. All my various experiences of growing up and "discovering myself" in the maze of U of T can be summed up in one lesson:
Sometimes, the things that are good for you don't feel good, and the things that feel great are leading you down the wrong path.
This is an elementary lesson that we learn as four-year-olds. "Eat your broccoli, Susan! Even if you don't like it, you must!" And, as a child, you throw a tantrum and sob, because children are accustomed to doing things that are enjoyable, and they think, with a logic that I now envy, that in life you should simply stick to the things you like. However, unless you are under twelve years old, or a self-serving hedonist, then you slowly learn that "life's a piece of shit" as the great Monty Python put it at the end of the very politically correct movie "Life of Brian." Doctor's appointments, taxes, calling in sick when you're really not, working out when you don't feel like it, choosing carrots over carrot cake, not partying that night because you have to study, not dating that guy even though it feels right but is oh so wrong, looking for marriage material instead of settling for shallow hookups. These are the lessons that I learned in university. That, yes, it's good to follow your dreams, but don't think for a moment that there won't be heaps of cow dung in your way (dung in the form of the great recession, nepotism, people not believing in you, succumbing to laziness, sexist/racist/ageist/homophobic/overall douchebag people that have power when you don't).
Basically, university taught me to be less animal/child/hedonist and more...adult human/emotionally mature and responsible mammal.
I'm not likely to use Virgilian pastoral poetry from pre-birth-of-Jesus times in my future career. And these past four years oftorture studying hard and working toward a near 4.0 GPA did not get me into grad school. Yet it was not all without purpose. I do feel that I have grown. Recent grads, imagine how you were around this time of year, ready to graduate from high school, unnecessarily preparing for prom night (biggest waste of $$$ you'll spend in your life, admit it). If you need help remembering this wonderful point in your life, just open up the dandy Facebook "On this Day" app. It should make you cringe. How much have you learned in those four years? What would present-day you say to high school graduate you? Worry less? Worry more? Enjoy your metabolism while it lasts?
Then realize how damn shallow that high school you was and be glad you are the adult that you are today. Seriously, if I had a conversation with my high school self I would hit her. I am, perhaps, not a better person now, but a...saner person. I still get anxiety, of course, but I feel like I can handle it better. I *try* not to be dramatic, as much as my poet/romantic soul tries to escape and write an embarrassing love letter to a one-night stand or something (true story). And yes, I finally realize that what feels good, is not always good for me. My intuition clouds the flimsy feelings of my heart and [sometimes] irrational logic of my mind (the most common one being: you're young! Do it!). High school me couldn't do that. She couldn't even recognize her own feelings. Present me is trying to, at least. Present me is not an animal/child/hedonist. Embrace the you you are today, and the hurdles of shitty things you had to do in order to learn this one valuable lesson.
Sometimes, the things that are good for you don't feel good, and the things that feel great are leading you down the wrong path.
This is an elementary lesson that we learn as four-year-olds. "Eat your broccoli, Susan! Even if you don't like it, you must!" And, as a child, you throw a tantrum and sob, because children are accustomed to doing things that are enjoyable, and they think, with a logic that I now envy, that in life you should simply stick to the things you like. However, unless you are under twelve years old, or a self-serving hedonist, then you slowly learn that "life's a piece of shit" as the great Monty Python put it at the end of the very politically correct movie "Life of Brian." Doctor's appointments, taxes, calling in sick when you're really not, working out when you don't feel like it, choosing carrots over carrot cake, not partying that night because you have to study, not dating that guy even though it feels right but is oh so wrong, looking for marriage material instead of settling for shallow hookups. These are the lessons that I learned in university. That, yes, it's good to follow your dreams, but don't think for a moment that there won't be heaps of cow dung in your way (dung in the form of the great recession, nepotism, people not believing in you, succumbing to laziness, sexist/racist/ageist/homophobic/overall douchebag people that have power when you don't).
Basically, university taught me to be less animal/child/hedonist and more...adult human/emotionally mature and responsible mammal.
I'm not likely to use Virgilian pastoral poetry from pre-birth-of-Jesus times in my future career. And these past four years of
Then realize how damn shallow that high school you was and be glad you are the adult that you are today. Seriously, if I had a conversation with my high school self I would hit her. I am, perhaps, not a better person now, but a...saner person. I still get anxiety, of course, but I feel like I can handle it better. I *try* not to be dramatic, as much as my poet/romantic soul tries to escape and write an embarrassing love letter to a one-night stand or something (true story). And yes, I finally realize that what feels good, is not always good for me. My intuition clouds the flimsy feelings of my heart and [sometimes] irrational logic of my mind (the most common one being: you're young! Do it!). High school me couldn't do that. She couldn't even recognize her own feelings. Present me is trying to, at least. Present me is not an animal/child/hedonist. Embrace the you you are today, and the hurdles of shitty things you had to do in order to learn this one valuable lesson.
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| Mmm, this carrot cake/irresponsible decision looks so moist and delicious! Perhaps we should save it for later or never, since you're a mature adult who can look at long term goals? |
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