One of the Animals

I'm not a role model, an intellectual, a poet. I'm not a good person and I'm not an evil person. I am just a member of the species Homo sapiens. I am blood, guts, and bone. I am an amusement park of veins. My heart feels no pain or pleasure; my heart just pumps blood. It would be silly to think that there is a deeper purpose, when I am a bundle of nerves wrapped in naked, papery skin. Why would I be part of a grandiose plan? I am just an animal.

There is no logic in the animal kingdom. There is no philosophy and no art; just a hierarchy of animals that kill and eat one another. We are part of that kingdom. Maybe Hobbes was right. Without security, we would be cannibals. Without morals, we would be foxes. Without politics, we would be wild.

We are wild. We are not ladies and gentlemen. We are panthers and wolves. We huddle in packs and howl at midnight just for the fun of it. We flee from danger by scurrying away like scared little squirrels. We would do anything for our kin. We would commit every possible sin if we were not afraid of the law or God or our own conscience.

I am not a lady. I am not a goddess and I am not Medusa. I am not any one thing because I am everything and nothing. I am everything because I exist. I am nothing because existence is futile.

I am just an animal. That is my only destiny.

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Every time I close my eyes, I see the fire That aches where you burned me last I am a woman of the earth and the cool soil Where life ferments and earthworms roam I can't survive the lava that pulses beneath The crust of this beautiful land Yellow dandelions piercing the grass Emerald pockmarked with gold I wish sometimes that I wasn't a woman of the earth I wish that I were stronger I wish that my bones were made of steel And my heart of flame So that I wouldn't fall apart at every Crude remark, every Light tug, every Covert attack That rolls off the back of a fire-woman Instead, my skin is transluscent Like the morning dew My muscles pieced together With tree sap and mushrooms What's an earth-woman to do In a world engulfed by fire? But root herself firmly to one place Grow a network of twisting underground limbs And create a stable home To escape the chaos of this world

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