Skip to main content

FAQ: Why is the term: "Poetic Scout" an Oxymoron?

Though the following is not a poem, it links to poetry and personal experience, so enjoy nonetheless. This blog is in dire need of some comic relief, wouldn't you agree? ;)

Why is the term, "Poetic Scout" an oxymoron?

I learned this from experience. No sooner had I been persuaded to join the army of scouts and tacky uniforms than I begun to have the growing urge to quit and get the hell out of there!

Poets do not belong in scouts- this is just a fact of life.

You cannot expect an absurd, artistic, and obediency-challenged poet to blend in with the flow of people who all dress and march exactly alike. What is the point of lifting your feet off of the ground at the same tempo as everyone else in the group, when you could concentrate less on your feet and more on your surroundings? A poet is distracted by the chirping of the birds and observes snowflakes gracefully falling to the ground. Just when I have an ideal start to a poem stuck in my head, I am disrupted by drum rolls and

"March! March! MARCH!"

The beautiful songbirds disappear, and I am lost in a haze of loud chants, constantly repeating themselves,

"Left, right, left!"

At the moment in which I feel like yelling, "shut the hell up!" to all those around me, I resist the temptation as I realize that this would be pointless as no one would be able to hear me over those noisy drums.

This is how the poet becomes even more absorbed in her own shell. Socializing in the scout group does more damage to a poet's intrapersonal personality than it does any good. Most poets have strong moral values, and do not wish for their judgement to be ignored or disrupted. The rest have gone out for a drink; what does the poet do? She stays behind, sticking to her own beliefs and is considered a drag. This quickly morphs into the domino effect. A rising number of people steer clear of the poet, as they think of her as a dull knife in the drawer.

Poets possess many good qualities- and one of the greatest of them all is that a poet is not afraid to resist peer pressure. In fact, poets and peers are like oil and water. Peers do not let our values budge a centimeter.

This is good in most cases, but in the scout team, it is a nightmare.

This mostly has to do with the fact that all scouts must wear a tacky uniform, with a tie and all. Everyone knows that navy does not match with jeans, and that grey skirts went out of fashion thirty odd years ago, so why in the world is the uniform designed so hideously?

A resistance to wearing the uniform is treated like a disbelief in God in the scout community.

"You're not wearing your uniform! My goodness, do not dare go out in public like that!"

There is so much more to rant on about, but I will stop there before this turns into some sort of anti-political speech.

In conclusion, to put things bluntly, if you are a poet and wish to be a scout, you are not an oxymoron, my friend.

You are simply a moron.



PS. Badges? What the hell is up with those. Let's all take pride in the pieces of cloth sewn on to our out of style uniforms.

I'm out.

Olga T.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Happiness is Pink Jellybeans

Happiness is jumping in a pool of pink jellybeans Feeling the cool candy on my skin Happiness is enjoying the pleasures of life Without worrying about confessing my sins Whoever said that we are gluttons For biting juicy pears on the beach Must never have felt the sand in their toes They must have placed their own soul out of reach And what about greed? It's not all that bad To bury a pile of chestnuts for the spring All animals do it, so why shouldn't we? If it's greedy to love yourself, let it be Lust is the one that makes pastors blush Yet it's one of the greatest joys in the body A kiss and a dance, laughter and romance Why did we ever label this happiness as naughty? Have you ever seen a cat sad when it naps? It is okay to sometimes be lazy The body needs rest as does the mind Or the world will set fire from the crazy If happiness is a sin, then let me smile in hell Looking up at the do-gooders above For to live is to err, to cry, and to sing Happiness is pink jell...

Humble

Remember the days we feared the gods? Neither do I, or maybe we just forgot I think we need a little superstition To quell our aching ambition We need to honour the moon and sun Just as the cavemen had done To find awe in the things all 'round Before we jumped in tech and drowned If we were to hunt our next meal We'd starve collectively, I feel Because we're even too cowardly to look In the beast's eyes whose lives we took It's simply sliced and put on display In a supermarket on the way Yes, we need to get back to our roots Take off our socks and high heel boots It's okay to feel a little scared It is how our ancestors fared Life shouldn't be riding on a cloud Idle hands make the devil proud So when you dwell into the woods Don't forget that the gods are not all good They teach us lessons as we preen Gluing our eyes to our phone screen If you're famous and if you're clever Doesn't mean you'll live forever We may be great, but there's...

Love From Afar

Some people are in our lives Meant to be loved from a distance There's nothing wrong with that It's just that we're too different Or perhaps even too alike Two north poles repelling each other A couple of lone wolves mingling A dog barking at its own reflection The same blood runs through our veins But we are not meant to know each other We're just meant to co-exist  On the same planet, but ignorant of the other A colourful scaled fish roaming the seas While a spider sits in its web in a barn One wholly unaware of the other But needing the other in some way For earth to reach an equilibrium Not everything is meant to be held forever Some things are meant to be let go Like the old school pencils at the bottom of the drawer Or the Barbie dolls in the back of the closet They're loved, but loved at a distance Admired from afar